Borderline Personality Disorder is BAD? therapist kati morton talking BPD, psychology & therapy

Negative videos seem to be going up about borderline personality disorder, specifically therapy, healthcare and mindfulness. I think that because so many people (professionals included) talk negatively about BPD, those of us who struggle with it can feel like it's hopeless and helpless. The truth is that BPD is something you can overcome! Yes it is a lot of work, but if we don't like how we are feeling then we have to do something about it to change it. Right?! It is my opinion that BPD is caused by either a lack of attachment to a primary care giver (mom, dad, grandma, etc) when we are a baby or it is caused by trauma. The attachment struggle can later lead to us trying to "fill" that need by other people in our lives, while also feeling scared that they will leave us too. So we want people around, and we want love and support, but we also fear that we can't trust people to be there for us and so we often try to push them away or even run away ourselves. Trauma can also lead to a lack of trust or feelings of safety. Therefore, our emotions can sort of "come out of nowhere" and we instantly feel scared and unsafe. Both of these situations lead us to feeling scared, not safe or trusting of those around us. That will make relationships very difficult. But does that make you a bad person? Absolutely not. I hope that you found this video helpful. Please share!! Because the more positive and accurate information we have out there the better. xox Videos about BPD: https://youtu.be/zPopjuKuweg https://youtu.be/E56S5cWSvuw Video about DBT: https://youtu.be/hDJi86n9-Rk Video with Hannah! https://youtu.be/KIBiRsK7uBA Website http://www.katimorton.com A BIG THANK YOU to my Patreon Patrons! Without you, I couldn't keep creating videos. xoxo https://www.patreon.com/katimorton I'm Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos! Business email: linnea@toneymedia.com Download my workbooks: visit Itunes and search for Kati Morton Mail: PO Box #665 1223 Wilshire Blvd. Santa Monica, CA 90403

Comments

Jeffrey armao: people with body are bad. it is a character disorder. a personality disorder. they have bad character and bad or non existent personalities. they know exactly what they are doing. they know what they do is wrong, evil or mean and do it anyway. how is that not bad? while I would support and encourage anyone who recognizes they are a jerk and tries to change, those with bpd who blame bpd as if it is something they picked up on the bottom of there shoe are precisely missing the whole point. excuses are the opposite of help for this character problem. bpd is a description of bad behaviour, not a disease. we don't coddle thieves because they have back issues, we jail them. stop stealing or face the consequences. same with bpd. my experience with a bpd spouse for 20 years has been an abusive horrific nightmare. feeling sorry for them only makes them worse.

PatrickAllenNL: I have friends with bpd and I would not trade them for anything

Madison Mindfulness: Thank you so much for this video. I wish people could separate their personal beef from mental health discussions.

Spaceseeker Carne: I live with an adult daughter who has undiagnosed BPD and is an alcoholic - it is killing me. I wish I could throw her out but I see that 2 year old that needs love and never got it. I dont know how it will end.

Nibor Iynahc: I just found you. I'm 57 and just found out what I have. I need this workbook. Please tell me how to get it.

enter.the.void.II: I'm scared of therapist who need therapists.
Besides, even the worst psychopath have had traumas in their lives. Using that as an argument that BPD are not bad people is silly. BPD can be bad just like everyone else.

Gonzo B.: Define "a bad person".

Sirley Ray: How would I know if I'm BPD or is it my husband?

Derek Kane: You seem to conveniently leave out how people with BPD push away people and medical professionals who try to help. Borderlines are survivors and probably have some of the best survival instincts. But they can affect loved ones who care.

Elizabeth Grable: Thank you for making this video!

natasha it: Find some of the comments quite upsetting really.. saying that people with BPD are abusive and manipulative and just down right nasty people makes me want to run and hide. I have hid my illness for so long that I feel like one day I will break, I have no friends and don't go out unless need to, I am not an attention seeker I hate any kinds of attention or drama, in fact that's why I'm a loner as so there's no drama. I'm babbling on trying to get to much out but how can I go for help or tell people if I'm just gonna be judged a bad person a lier an abusive person an manipulative person. People need to remember that not everyone is the same with this illness and we all act differently with it.

natasha it: Kati your such an amazing inspiration 😍 had a melt down today which lasted all day and stumbled on your videos and wow you have made me feel happy. Thanks to you I'm not going to fight this alone any more and keep it secret. Just one question can I be helped at 31? I was diagnose at 20 but ran away with it as was embrassed. Thank you for being such an amazing person 😍

Es' Bignell: I don't feel normal most of the time :(
Different. ..

Es' Bignell: Thank you much for this

Cecilia Morales: I have it and its a nightmare . it sucks.

Brandy Adams: I have that same work book. I never worked in it because it felt overwhelming to face all of my emotional baggage.

Britt Downard: I have BPD, ironically enough it's also my initials. I have a very difficult time trusting people and I'm constantly in the swirl of self hate, fear, anxiety, etc. But I work very hard to not let it affect the important things. I don't care much about friends because people come and go, so I make friends, hang out with them for awhile, and then generally move on after a bit. But I stay close with my mother and I've been dating my gf for about a year, and we haven't had a single argument. I know my mind isn't right, so if something bothers me I try really hard to understand the perspective of the other person and I give it time. If I'm still upset about it in a day, then I bring it up, but I've never had to do that with my gf. We came from very different backgrounds, but we get each other. She has anxiety and depression and I have a big ole cluster fuck of mental shit going on. I don't take my problems out on her and she doesn't take hers out on me. If anything, we've found a good balance. She calms me when I'm being irrational and treats me like a person. In exchange I do my best to improve her life. I stand up for her or help her with social interactions and I do my best to protect her. She grew up in a strict household, she's very mature, and not a lot of attention was given to her issues because she was so well adjusted. I'm used to taking care of people so she finally has someone to just consider her. Her maturity also has helped me really get my life in order. Things are working for us, BUT it's because I realize that I'm not perfectly sane. When I was younger, I was angry. I was abused as a kid, a lot of family problems, I was a gay Pentecostal Christian- that was a real bitch, and when I was in high school, my brother went to Afghanistan, my dad left, and then my mom left within a six month period. Spent a good bit of time homeless. And I pitied myself. So I did bad things. I fought people, robbed people, I did anything I could to be seen as a threat so people stopped fucking with me. And it worked. But it felt like I lost something. Ended up with this girl a couple years ago. Loved her, but she was awful. Mean, manipulative, even killed my dog. BUT she called me out on my bullshit. Which is when it hit me that I deserved her. I wasn't good, so that's why we matched. I decided I didn't want to deserve that anymore. I left the state and moved across the country to a place where I didn't know anyone. And then I started over. That's around the time I met my new girl. But anyway, I try to help the homeless as often as possible because I've been there. I want to be a park ranger and protect nature and teach kids about wildlife. Animals are better than people, and I'm really good at taking care of things. My entire point of this long ass post, a ship isn't steered by it's wake. Your past doesn't have to control your future. Try to find purpose and acknowledge your issues. If you catch yourself thinking about how awful you are, try to remember that it doesn't have to be reality unless you let it. And sometimes your weaknesses can be strengths. Because I don't care a lot about people, I don't worry to much about how I'm perceived so I'm able to make small talk and make new friends quickly. If I get an interview, there's a 99% choice I'll get it. I'm paranoid which has gotten my family and friends out of a lot of tricky situations, also I'm really good at security work because I observe closely. I'm a very emotional person so I relate to people's problems well, and I've put up with so much insanity, I can handle other people's mental illnesses well. I feel a lot of emotions which makes me passionate. I see a lot of beauty in the world. Also, If you get upset, i recommend charitymiles. Listen to Head On (hold on to your heart) by man man- it reminds me to try to be loving and hopeful (cheesy I know), Go for a walk, clear your head, and money gets donated to a charity of your choice. Just some advice. I'm rooting for you guys. Shit can get much, much better. Just be patient and know I love y'all.

Survival Farm Coach: Bought the workbook immediately!

wot dephoque: Is it possible to have BPD and be an introvert and have depression / anxiety?

ThatWeirdKidAaron: BPD sounds complicated, but I don’t think it makes someone bad. Wouldn’t that be more of a narcissistic personality disorder? Or a psychopath?

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