Welcome to Hard Talk. I'm Isaiah. You're here for the hard truth and I'm here to give it to you. Just because someone is close to you doesn't mean they know what's best for you. They don't. You know what's best for you. You need to stay true to yourself. Here's how. First, never sacrifice your identity to someone else. Second, set strict boundaries for your space and your time. Third, don't feel obligated to care about the same things that someone else cares about. Look, letting other people change you is a sure-fire way to end up miserable. Check this out. A study published by the British Medical Journal asked a group of people to agree with their relationship partner's every opinion and request without complaint even if they believed their partner was wrong. The quality of life of both the participants was measured using a scoring scare of 1-10, 10 being the best possible quality of life and 1 being the least. The results, after only twelve days the agreeing participants quality of life score fell from a 7 on average to a 3, a 7 to a 3 in less than two weeks. If you want to stop being miserable, you have to stop letting other people change you. You have to stay true to yourself. You have to stop compromising. Here's how. First, stop sacrificing your identity to someone else. Being in a relationship is not easy. It doesn't matter if it's a friendship, romantic relationship, family relationship or any other type of relationship. Either way things can get hard. Over time, more and more conflicts will happen and as a result it becomes easier and easier to stop standing up for yourself. It becomes easier to stop doing what you want to do to just to keep the peace. It becomes easy to lose who you are. Too many people sacrifice who they are at their core just to keep other people from going crazy. They sacrifice their very soul to keep smaller minded people from creating drama. This is wrong. These same people falsely assume that keeping the peace is morally right. They think that killing the fight inside of them is the right thing to do, but it's not. Nothing could be further from the truth. Killing the fight inside of you is not self-sacrifice, it's self destruction. By rolling over again and again, you don't become stronger; you become a former shell of yourself. Don't make the mistake of changing who you are just to keep someone else happy or just to keep someone else around. Keep yourself in check by always asking yourself, "What do I really want? Is this what the real me would do or is this what the fake me would do?" Second, set strict boundaries for your space and time. When you have to pay bills, meet obligations, and provide for others, it's hard to find time for yourself. Not only is it hard to find alone time, it's hard to feel like it's okay to be alone. Too many people feel uncomfortable or even feel guilty for spending time by themselves. They feel selfish for making room for their own thoughts, desires, and actions. The problem with this is that your quality of life improves with the more time you spend with yourself. The more alone time you have, the more you're able to give to relationships. If you're not mentally and physically at a 100%, you can't be there for others 100%. The value you add to yourself is proportional to the value you can add to your relationships so start protecting your space and start protecting your time. Realize that you need time and space for relaxation, reflection, and self-improvement. If you're always busy giving your time and space to someone else you will never grow. You'll never get better. You'll never be able to give more. Third, don't feel obligated to care about the same things that someone else cares about. Everyone is not obligated to fight for the same cause. Everyone is not obligated to do what you want to do. At the same time, you are not obligated to do what other people want you to do. You have to decide what's important to you and stick to it. If you constantly let people distract you from your goals in life, you'll never get anywhere. If you constantly let people use drama to steal your attention, you will fail so stop feeling obligated to care about other people's problems. Stop letting people make you feel guilty. Instead, start putting your time and energy towards things you believe in. Start feeling obligated to yourself. Do this and you'll live a more confident and focused life. Until next time, live like a lion.
John Torres: Bravo!
T AG: wow..so true!!!!!
Hindhokatu Dhugaani: I like. You r advice. I wish if when we are child they teach instat ot teching mats.if we laern about life couch us child it butter than mats
Hindhokatu Dhugaani: Tanks .this is wat i am thinking
Jo Betts: You're a very good speaker!
corvan lopez: I Abhor Manipulation
Ebonee Hines: Us Good people always get disappointed
Ste H: Good stuff, a big help.
J. F.: I really appreciate how straight forward you are and that you get to the point right away. Thank you.
Beauty Mar: New subscriber. You’re fantastic!!!
Addictive Gaming: he's not wrong on what he's saying, but if people are here to listen to what he's saying and believing this is the answer to their problem, im sorry but all this could have been figured out with common sense and if you did not figure this out on your own, then you have more problems and just a manipulator in your life.
Hindhokatu Dhugaani: Tanks azc god adavice bro
Stephanie Emerine: I did this with a narcissist roommate. I totally lost sight of who I was and what I wanted to do. I stood up for myself at he beginning of the semester and she got physical with me. I moved out. But I'm still trying to find me again.
Brad A: Great, thanks
Delta Soldier: I seen a lot of this stuff this guy is talking about on the military in the end!!!
deep change: What ever you say brother is accurate. I applied all your advices and I got good results
xuxu4life: why dont u have more views？ This is gold！
_Seren_: You’re great!
Stuart Courtney: Brilliant,
mohamed yousry: God bless you man ..I had a big problem in my life because of my dad .he is like what u say he is a manipulator ...but from now on ...no more manipulation...I will live for my ownself only
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